Cleaning Up - World Cup musings 2

As those living in England - sorry, Eng-er-land! - cannot but be aware, there is some sort of football competition in the offing. Shops abound with retail opportunities - World Cup tie-in beer, crisps, flags and all you need to ensure a fun-filled four weeks on the sofa.

And the sofa itself, of course - retailers are falling over themselves to persuade us to buy new furniture and state-of-the-art television sets in time for the sporting extravaganza, together with England shirts to wear as we watch. There's even a handy viewing timetable complete with pull-out red and yellow cards courtesy of a local estate agent.

But one of the most bizarre tie-ins appeared in my mailbox this week, inviting me to

Kick off the World Cup

with this

Exclusive

Offer...

So what are they trying to sell me this time? Drinks? Pizza? A reclining leather armchair with built-in beer cooler? No, the advert is for dry-cleaning - three items for the price of two.

I have to admit, this one's got me puzzled. I mean, even allowing for the combination of high excitement and abundant comestibles, there's surely a limit to how much dry-cleaning a televised football tournament can generate. And in any case, there's a celebratory air to the advert that is, I feel, hardly justified by a visit to the local dry cleaner.

It's sad to think that retailers are prepared to stake money on a Pavlovian reflex - put the words 'World Cup' on it and it will sell, no matter how mundane, boring and unconnected with football it is.