Is that £10,000 in your pocket...?

What do you call an Italian with £10,000 in his underwear? Lacking creativity.

No, it's not a joke; UK Border Officers found the cash when they searched the man before a flight from Belfast to Rome. He was, it seems, 'unable to give a reasonable explanation for carrying the cash'.

Is it me, or does that suggest a deplorable paucity of imagination? I mean, if you intend to board a flight with £10K stuffed into your clothing then surely you'd take the trouble to have some plausible cover story ready.

Readers may recall that the woman caught in Holyhead last May with 26,000 euros stuffed into her bra, possibly in an attempt to foil all but the most determined of pickpockets, claimed the money came from the sale of a business in Ireland.

The BBC is, of course, milking this story for all it's worth under the headline 'Italian's Hidden Assets Uncovered' - About £10,000 in hidden cash was recovered from an Italian man's underwear'. In fact, the cash appears to have been stashed rather less sensationally (but more comfortably) in the man's shorts, pockets and wallet.

The Tavern regulars have been discussing what excuse they might offer if caught in the same compromising situation - suggestions via comments would be very welcome.