Of all the animals of prey, man is the only sociable one.
Every one of us preys upon his neighbour, and yet we herd together.
The Beggar's Opera: John Gay

Sunday 13 July 2014

Quote of the day - outsize edition

Continuing on the theme of the unfortunate encounter experienced by a late night traveller which was the subject of last Wednesday's post, a comment on the logistics of six women squeezed into the confines of a train lavatory got me thinking, so, in an idle moment, I tried to find out the dimensions involved.

This, it turned out, was easier said than done, though it was almost certainly one of the modern sliding-door affairs with room for a wheelchair or for one of those double buggies that provide such interesting and varied gymnastic challenges for other users of Britain's high streets and public transport.

The size of the new cubicles has led to their number being drastically reduced to the point where there may be only three toilets to cater for the needs of an entire train full of passengers. Instead of a quick trip to the facility at the end of the coach, travellers now need to embark on a lengthy and often futile quest to find an unoccupied cubicle.

Incidentally, it is, in theory, possible that the lavatory in this story was decorated with the winning image from c2c's design-a-door competition; with commendably creative sadism, the judges chose a large and vivid depiction of a dripping tap sure to be greatly appreciated by pent-up travellers waiting cross-legged in the corridor outside.

Anyway, this research ultimately led to a somewhat startling headline in the South Wales Evening Post:
Port Talbot train station toilets 'too small for portly women' says Llanelli MP 
Political correctness evidently has not yet arrived in Llanelli, at least in describing the larger lady.


  1. Been there.

    The average tart there shows up on radar.

  2. It was the gravitational pull of the first one that sucked the other five into the toilet....

  3. JuliaM, that might explain why the miniskirts appear to have made such a profound impact on witnesses.

    Rightwinggit, given your version, perhaps 'portly' has something going for it after all...

    It would have been better, though, had she stuck to the suitcase question; I think we can all relate to the worry of leaving the luggage outside the cubicle where any light-fingered passers-by can help themselves.


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