Quote of the day - 'not now!'

Before we finally leave the Torquay Herald Express, this story caught my eye:

BREAKING NEWS: Child and parent stuck in mud

The emergency services are working together to rescue a young child, and what is understood to be a parent, who are both stuck in mud at Combeinteignhead near Newton Abbot.

The reporter was clearly quick off the mark but this is 21st-century journalism; rather than racing to the scene, he or she seems to have set about phoning around for quotes while the rescue was going on.

The first source was a fruitful one:

A spokesman for the police said...“The fire service have launched a raft on the river and are pulling them out.”

...but things went downhill from there: the Fire Service wouldn't comment because of industrial action and the local pub denied any involvement, which is fair enough, and finally I invite you to consider the unspoken subtext behind:

...the coastguard confirmed they were involved but were too busy to give further details.