It's been a good weekend for Darwin Award* hopefuls; today's Telegraph features side-by-side two stories that surely deserve honourable mention.
Firstly there's the Ipswich man who had to be cut free by firefighters after getting his arm stuck inside a pub vending machine. When the machine refused to dispense a cuddly toy for his son, our hero bravely reached inside, becoming so firmly lodged that it took his rescuers more than an hour to free him.
He may, of course, have been inspired by this...
Meanwhile a Manchester builder created his very own fireball when he liberally sprayed air freshener round the interior of his van then lit a cigarette - which makes one wonder why he bothered with air freshener in the first place.
*For those who "do a service to Humanity by removing themselves from the gene pool" in some particularly stupid fashion. In these cases, honourable mention only, as both are now recovering.
Should Torvill and Dean be knighted?
2 hours ago