Toast of the week

This week, we in the Tavern are raising a tankard to not one but two latter-day worthies.

First there is former pathologist Professor Green, whose cynical view of his fellow-man takes some beating;

"I think if the heavens were striking in cases of spontaneous combustion then there would be a lot more cases."

There would, presumably, also be rather more people in church of a Sunday - for all but the most altruistic, there is a certain satisfaction in the prospect of divine retribution waiting to strike down those who trespass against us.

Increased church attendance would definitely please our second hero, Alderman Alan Graham from Bangor, Co. Down;

A farmer who allowed one of the world's best-selling pop stars to film in his grain field told her to cover up after she stripped down for a video.

In our celebrity-obsessed age, there is something wonderfully refreshing about a man who not merely professes ignorance of a major pop star but has no qualms about ignoring her attendant media circus and asking her to behave properly when on his land.

"I thought it was inappropriate. I requested them to stop and they did," he explained. "I wish no ill will against Rihanna and her friends. Perhaps they could acquaint themselves with a greater God."

While I don't share Alderman Graham's religious beliefs, I salute his refusal to compromise his principles in the face of a celebrity, her entourage and an audience of onlookers.

Alderman Graham and Professor Green, your health!